10 Retro Board Game Ads

Don’t! Wake! Daddy! He’s an alcoholic with a mean temper…

Geoffrey Goldenby Geoffrey Golden

It’s family game night, guys. That means the whole family’s gonna get together – god dammit – and have some fun – for Christ’s sake – or so help me I will murder you kids with my bare–! Whoa, having a bit of a childhood flashback there. Anyway, enjoy these commercials for board games from the 80s and 90s:



Best theme song for anything ever?


Mouse Trap

Mouse Trap / I guarantee / It’ll break down by hour three.


Hungry Hungry Hippos

It sure as hell beats the waiting game.


Shark Attack

It ate off my arm! Why? Whyyyyyy?


Mall Madness

To win, buy everything at the mall. Especially more copies of Mall Madness!



“WooOOOoow! The crazy thing happening is me having a heart attack!”


Don’t Wake Daddy

"Unless you're lookin' for an ass whoopin', son. Your call."



The first guy you’re operating on? Hopefully, the dude from the Perfection commercial.


Guess Who

The game cards don’t talk? But I bought the game so they’d be my friends.



You don’t wanna smoke crack? I thought you said you wanted to get into trouble. What are you, a pussy or something?


Geoffrey Golden is the Editor in Chief of The Devastator: The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans! Header via.