Johnny Depp’s ‘Thin Man’ Remake Gives Jerry Stahl a Shot

Former heroin addict 'Alf' writer to pen screenplay about adorable crime-solving drunks.

William Bibbianiby William Bibbiani

Johnny Depp's 'Thin Man' Remake Gives Jerry Stahl a Shot

Another day, another bit of remake news. But this one’s actually kind of interesting… Johnny Depp is attached to star in a remake of the popular Thin Man series of films, six of which were made between 1934 and 1947, based on the final novel by famed mystery writer Dashiell Hammett (The Maltese Falcon). The film starred William Powell and Myrna Loy as Nick and Nora Charles, a pair of high-functioning alcoholics who solved mysteries alongside their pet dog, Asta, when they weren’t tossing out bon mots like rice on a wedding day: "I’m a hero. I was shot twice in the Tribune." "I read where you were shot five times in the tabloids." "It’s not true. He didn’t come anywhere near my tabloids." Hilarious stuff. Maybe they could cast Johnny Depp opposite Angelina Jolie and… Oh wait.

But we knew all that already. Now it appears that the project has finally nabbed a screenwriter: Jerry Stahl, who’s written for such television series as CSI: Crime Scene Investigation and Alf. Stahl is perhaps best known for his memoir Permanent Midnight, which detailed his descent into heroin addiction. The film adaptation of the same name starred Ben Stiller and received critical acclaim, not that anybody actually saw the thing. Stahl knows his addiction, he knows his comedy, and it will be interesting to see him mix the two while Nick and Nora Charles mix their drinks. Hollywood Reporter had the story.

Depp’s Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides director Rob Marshall is currently in negotiations to direct The Thin Man. We like the talent attached, and it’s not like remaking a movie after 65 years is total sacrilege. Even if it stinks, the original film series is beloved and well-remembered, and it will certain;y survive any contemporary mangling Hollywood can put together.

Crave Online will return with more Thin Man news as soon as we finish these thin mints. It’s going to take us a while. We have a lot of thin mints.*

*This is barely a joke.